There's a word that has always had a bitter sweet meaning to me. What's the word?
Change.
Change can be good, but it can also be bad, or sad.
I've had to deal with a lot of change and it's been from both aspects of it. But what's really changed me as a person has been change in friendships.
Friends in my life are something that I put at the top of my list of things that I value. I love my friends with all my heart. But sometimes I love them too much to notice that something's not right. With one friend I had, I was too forgiving. Too blind to see that every time I forgave them for something was just another chance for them to hurt me again. It wasn't till the point that I was left in tears crying to another friend who was trying to help me through this that I realized what I had to do. I had to change my friendship with them to a non existent one for the better. Was it hard? Oh yes. Imagine the awkwardness of having to be in the same room as them knowing that they are staring at you. Imagine being on the same sports team as that person and having the same leadership position as them so you are forced to talk to them. Imagine sitting right in front of that person in a class and knowing that they're staring at the back of your head. Can you imagine all that? Yeah, I had to go through that as part of my process of change and it was hard, so hard. But was it worth it? Definitely, because a lot of good things came out of it. I was able to get a new best friend and see what a true friendship is, I got to spend more time with what I love doing and with a group of people that I love a lot, and I was able to change the person that I am into an even better one.
Change isn't easy friends, but it's possible.
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